I'm prerecording this blog because 1) I don't feel like writing my sakubun right now, even though it's short; 2) I feel wordy; and 3) if I get distracted by chat like I always do, I won't get it posted writing it in real-time. It's mostly weekend recap and random babbling, so really, time isn't that important.

Mmkay, Friday night I went to sleep at 8 PM. Nobody cares about that. So I'll move to Saturday. I got up and was all excited about spending some time by myself - people had plans that didn't include me, so I decided to spend the day by myself. I went down to Nagoya Eki, hit Animate and KAC Shop, where I sold some DJ and bought a new one, specifically Sannasubi's new Naruto release from Comiket. I'm happy she's gonna have the next book in that series out at Comic City, 'cause I wanna know who this Mystery Person from Kakashi's past is. ^^ Poor Iruka. He's such an abused uke. Not quite like Sasuke - Iruka's more beleaguered than he is surly.

Anyway. My plan that day was to go see "Wasabi", which is a new Luc Besson/Jean Reno movie that's been out in France for a few months, but it just opened in Japan this weekend. The movie got a decent amount of press, because while it's a French movie, the female lead is Ryoko Hirosue, a Japanese actress. I saw a TV show about the movie - apparently Ryoko Hirosue didn't know any French when she took the role, but she homestayed for a month and took intensive French lessons. Anyway, the movie is in French with Japanese subtitles, and it looked really interesting, not to mention that I liked The Professional, so I figured I'd be into "Wasabi". However, it wasn't playing at the theater I thought it would be at, so I picked a different movie. (I did find out that it's playing in Fushimi, so I'm going to go see it over this upcoming break.) There are only two English movies playing at the Nagoya Eki theaters - Harry Potter, which I've already seen, and Ocean's 11, which had massive lines since it's opening weekend and it stars Brad Pitt. So I looked at the posters and picked something else that looked interesting, which ended up being a movie called "Rain". The poster has a picture of a guy with a gun to his head, and it says something about "loved by no one, he is a killer." Sounds good to me.

"Rain" is a Thai movie, produced by the Pang Brothers, if that means anything to you. The movie was in Thai, with Japanese subtitles. I know absolutely no Thai, so all I had to go on was the JP subtitles - and I was happy, I think I understood over 90% of what they said. The movie was about an assassin named Kon (That's his name according to the Japanese subtitles - I don't know how his name would really be romanized.) who happened to be deaf. Ever since he was little, people picked on him because he was deaf. When he was young, he got a job sweeping floors in a shooting gallery, and continued working there until he was in his late teens. One day, a guy who was shooting there asked Kon to have a shot. He took the gun and shot the target five times in the chest. The guy was impressed by his shooting skills, and he took Kon on as his pupil. He taught Kon how to fight, shoot, kill, etcetera. And in that way, Kon became an assassin. The movie progressed, Kon fell in love with a Nice Girl who worked at a pharmacy, the skanky girlfriend got raped, Kon's mentor-teacher-type was killed, the skanky girlfriend was killed, and finally Kon shot himself in the head while the Nice Girl and all the cops watched. That was a very abbreviated summary, and quite a bit more happened. It was a pretty good movie, worth my 1000 yen, but I don't think I'd pay that much to see it again. (Rape scenes bug me. >_<) It helped my comprehension that Kon was deaf, therefore he really didn't have that many lines, and those that he had were written out on paper. There was still a decent amount of comprehension needed, though, and honestly, if I hadn't been able to read the subtitles, I don't think I would have known that Kon was deaf.

The next day, I got together with Mii-chan, as we decided to go see Ocean's 11. So we went down to Nagoya Eki again, and killed time until the movie was going to start. Finally we went to buy tickets, and they told us that it was standing room only. Japanese theaters oversell themselves, which is a massive fire hazard, but in a country as naturally crowded as Japan, I guess it's another commonality. So we decided to go back to her place and watch a movie, since we'd both already seen Harry Potter and I didn't feel like sitting there translating anything that day. Mii-chan had borrowed "Ever After" from a friend of hers, and while that is /not/ my type of movie, I decided to watch it 'cause she had it there, which meant that we didn't have to walk all the way down to the video store and back. It wasn't the worst movie in the world, and it certainly wasn't the best. Far from it. I spent a bunch of time making fun of the movie...specifically DaVinci (Bob DaVinci, you know, the genius plumber), the general lameness of the plot, and most importantly, Prince Henry's Family Jewels, which were the most prominent things in the entire movie. That man had a GIGANTIC package. I realize that it was the fault of the codpiece that he was wearing, but still, it was really distracting whenever he turned sideways to do anything. XD I am a depraved little girl.

Which brings me up to this evening, in which I went to see Ocean's 11. This time, I finally got in. I went with my friend Jamie, and we had dinner at Subway beforehand, and then went to the movie. I liked it! George Clooney is a good-looking man. I don't care how old he is. And Matt Damon was really cute, in his Junior Criminal role. There were some interesting things that happened there, though - first of all, there were several parts of the movie at which Jamie and I were laughing, and we were the only people in the theater laughing. This just further proves that Japanese people don't understand American humor. The two I remember the best were the scene in which the beefy dude is pretending to beat up Danny, but he's really just smacking himself around inside that room. The other was right at the end, where you see Danny in the tuxedo, and Rusty says, "I hope you were the groom." I suppose that you'd have to understand the idea of prison bitches, which your average Japanese person may or may not get, but I'd think that a guy pretending to beat someone up who didn't exist would be pretty universally funny. *shrug* Also, in the part where they're stealing the Pinch, and the two guys are playing 20 Questions in the front seat of the car - when they said "Evel Knievel" in English, it was subtitled "Ichiro". XD Linus said "boku" throughout. Rusty said "ore" as did Danny, except when he was talking to Tess, in which he used "boku". More fun with translation - there's a preview for that Arnold Schwarzenegger movie where his son is killed in a terrorist attack playing, and when the CIA guy says to Arnold, "You can't take the law into your own hands," it's subtitled, "Fukushuu wo kangaeruna." (Don't think about revenge.)

Yes, Kristi, I can really see Danny and Rusty. ;D I'd also give an approving nod to Rusty and Linus. Rusty's more easily slashable than Danny is, anyway, due to lack of any apparent interest in women. Ufufu. And as for the fic...well, you win some, you lose some. I kinda expected people to hate it. In fact, if I wasn't in Japan and had my mind so thoroughly warped by the Fangirl Mindset here, the Kakashi/Sakura pairing would make me scream in terror. I can't even explain why I like it, that's the worst part. >_> I guess it's sort of like the Ralf/Leona thing, only Leona's a lot cooler than Sakura. *shrug* I'm just glad that you didn't disown me. I did warn j00, didn't I? ^^;

Pairings I Like In Naruto, For What It's Worth: Kakashi/Sasuke, Kakashi/Iruka, Kakashi/Sakura. Kakashi/Kurenai, Asuma/Kurenai. Sasuke/Sakura. Asuma/Kakashi. (That's the only pairing in which I can see Kakashi being the uke.) Orochimaru's an interesting case. I think that'd just be creepy. I am not a screaming Hayate fangirl, nor am I particularly into Haku or Zabuza. I mean, Haku and Zabuza are fine characters, but to me their slashiness was adequately expressed in canon. Naruto/Hinata, I guess? I'd like Ino to find someone too, but I have no idea who to put her with. Most JP ficcers dump her off with Shikamaru so that Sakura can get together with Sasuke. I haven't read a fic yet where they actually gave good reason for Ino to get together with Shikamaru, and I'd like to see that, since I /LIKE/ Ino. While I came to like Sakura, and Hinata's okay. Ino is really where it's at. She's a bitch - and I like that about her. She's just not the type of character that the JP fandom seems to like, which is why she does so bad in all the character polls. In the most recent one, she was #24 out of...30, I think. I think it's the fangirls who send in the responses for the character ranking polls. Look at the top 15 from the recent poll that was in Jump 6-7:

1) Naruto; 2) Kakashi; 3) Iruka; 4) Sasuke; 5) Lee; 6) Hinata; 7) Gaara; 8) Hayate; 9) Gamabunta; 10) Shiraiya; 11) Haku; 12) 4th Generation Hokage; 13) Neji; 14) Sakura; 15) Zabuza.

Iruka's a good guy, but I keep wondering how he makes it to the top of the polls, considering his relatively limited involvement in the series. And I was wrong. Ino is #32 out of 50, and Kurenai is #35. I bet Kurenai would be more popular if they'd give her more involvement. *shakes Kishimoto-sensei* Why is it the really cool female characters always get abandoned for the wimpy, crying ones that the fans seem to like more? *sigh* I'm looking forward to the beginning of March. There's a new Naruto volume coming out, which should bring me up through chapter 99. That's almost current with the Jumps that I've been amassing. There should be a new volume of HikaGo in March, and that'll catch me up with the Isumi No Go story as well as the chapters I'm missing, and also the release of the HikaGo illustration collection. The Lord of The Rings movie starts March 2, and I've already got plans to go with a couple of my friends. March should be a sucky month as far as school goes, but outside of school, it promises to rock my socks.

You know what? I want my real friends back. It's not that I don't like the people that I hang around with here, but I feel like I need to maintain a certain amount of emotional distance from them. They're fine with being friends with me, but the "me" that they know isn't the Real Me. I'm afraid to have people over to my place because then they'll see my anime posters, they'll see my doujinshi, and they'll see who I really am - a nerd. They don't know that I went to Comiket, they don't know about the Jump Festa...they don't really know who I am. The people I'm friends with here know as much as I allow them to know, because I know that they're not going to be accepting of the parts of me that aren't Normal College Student.

I miss my life at the University of Iowa. I miss playing video games while Ka sits on my computer, talking in #y, making screencaps of Lunar 2 for our Game Bishounen Shrine. I miss the excitement of getting a box from Toshi, and sitting around looking at our new doujinshi. I miss staying at the LMC until 3:30 AM, reading fic, writing fic, writing PAPERS...dancing through the aisles to the Nikki song, doing the Norris Pose and then drawing it in the newly-fallen snow at 6:30 AM while we wait for Bruegger's to open. I miss gaming with Ryan-kun, or watching Queer as Folk after going to Hy-Vee at 10:30 PM. I miss the Japanese department at Iowa, and all our cool senseis back there. I miss Erin, and wish that we were still friends. I miss the Wedge, KoF, and anime on Saturday nights. I wish I could have taken all of that with me to Japan, but then I wouldn't really be having a unique experience here.

I miss my summer with the IL-gumi. I miss being able to drive two-three hours and be able to see Priya or Juri or Kristi. I miss spending weekends with Juri and Greg, and Laura and Brian and Matt, and I miss playing DDR and Super Smash Brothers with them. I miss the communal box of Krispy Kremes, and I miss getting drunk with Puu and trying to play video games, all the while screaming about how GHEI the world is. I miss making fun of the Final Fantasy movie with Kristi, and I miss geeking with Greg about console games. Did I ever tell you, Greg, how much I enjoyed driving to and from Bloomington-Normal with you? We'd never gotten a good chance to talk before that, and I'm grateful that we did.

Life takes you in a lot of different directions. I've changed peer groups three times in the last six years. I barely talk to anyone who I went to high school with - it's not that I dislike them, which isn't the case at all. They've just moved on and led their lives one way, and I've gone down a different path than them. And two of my really good friends from Iowa aren't talking to me anymore - one by my choice, and one as a result of bad circumstances. Now I've got a whole new group of friends, and I sometimes wonder what would have happened if I'd chosen to go to the University of Illinois instead of the University of Iowa. I would have gone to JAC, and I would have met my current friends three years earlier than I had. But would they have become my friends? I can't say. And would I be here, in Japan? I also can't say.

Lately I've been thinking about where I'll be in five years. A lot of people I know have rough plans of what they're going to do with themselves, but I can't even say I've got a preliminary sketch. I'll graduate from an average state university with a mediocre GPA, and I'll get an entry-level job that may or may not relate to my major. I'll move where the work takes me - whether that's staying in the Midwest, or going out West or East, I can't say; all I can say is that I think I'll go wherever seems to feel right. If I get married in the future, that'll happen; I'm not making an effort to find a husband, and since I don't want kids, I can't say that I feel any pressure from my Biological Clock to start breeding anytime soon. I don't really regret very much that I've done in the past. Even if it was stupid, and even if I ended up getting hurt or in trouble, it was done because I chose to. I see this period of my life as a time to reach out and try things - dip my feet in as many puddles as I can, because this is the time of life to do it. So I'll smoke various substances, and get too drunk to walk. I'll get into relationships not knowing where they'll end up. I'll go where life takes me, and see the parts of the world that I can. I'll meet all different kinds of people; who knows, maybe one or two of them will stick with me on a permanent basis.

When you're young, you have more of a license to be stupid and flighty than when you're older. Society is willing to forgive a 21-year old who sits on the steps of Yoshinoya smoking cigarettes and laying all over a boy she barely knows. The same doesn't go for someone in their 40s. I want to be able to look back on my life someday and say, "I've done the things I wanted to," instead of having a lot of regrets and what-if's. All the while, I'll hold tightly to the things I consider permanence. No matter how many branches of the river of life I choose to float down, there's always got to be something that I can hold onto - something that I know will be there. And as sappy as it sounds, I hope that's my family, because no matter how much they annoy me sometimes, they're important to me.

God, I've gotten philosophical. It's the second half of this Cowboy Bebop movie soundtrack. It just gets you to thinking. Well, actually, Cowboy Bebop can get you to thinking about your life. Aside from the cool space battles, Jeet Kune Do, and Faye's breasts, the show's also about how all different people lead their lives, and how the encounters you have with people can change who you are. I suppose I should stop now, before I start writing myself into emotional circles. Oh, and there is still the matter of that sakubun.